Little Girl, Get up

Ok, I had an interesting dream last night… I can’t remember the exact details but I do remember being in my old childhood home.  I have had numerous dreams in my old childhood home and usually, it doesn’t end well, something dark and weird ends up happening.  In the past, those types of dreams would get the best of me, conjuring thoughts of anxiety, loneliness, feeling weak, helpless, just everything not good.  I would wake up and not want to deal with the day, having this dark cloud over me most of the until my busy day would cause me not to think about it…but then, as I would lay my head down that following night… well, hoping to have decent dreams… no, the cycle continues.

Dreams are symbolic right?   Rarely do I get a step by step, or a real storyline in my dreams.  I only see glimpses, short scenes that don’t really develop into something I can fully understand.  After I wake up I try to make sense of it, trying to remember the big stuff, the key ingredients that stood out, and try to make sense of it by googling dream meanings or creating my own meanings.  But yeah, as I have gotten older I realized God speaks in your dreams. God guides you, inspires you, and even encourages you to have faith in showing His promises in your life.  I’ve had dreams that transpired into my reality.  Things that didn’t even make sense to me… Like teaching fitness classes.  I had a dream years before that I was teaching at a gym, tons of people with bright colored leggings and tops. I couldn’t believe it at the time because I was terrified to be in that role, feeling like I was inadequate, but God saw more.  I even have dreams about other people, people I don’t even know that well.  It was like God was using me as a conduit to reach this person.  So, at the time, I was a teaching assistant at a fine arts elementary school.  I was still unsure what was next in my life.  The best choice would be to go the next step and become a certified teacher, have your own classroom, get the teacher clothes, whatever… but I just wasn’t in it.  I had NO desire to decorate a classroom, or to be back in any educational institution.. (side note: my previous job was at a children’s art museum. not a school. SO DIFFERENT.) ANYWAY, this message in my dream wasn’t even for me, a co-worker.  In the dream, we had a conversation and I told her to get back to her art, visual art.  She was a fourth-grade teacher at a fine arts school.  That must of been torture: to be around the arts but nowhere near it.  So, of course, the next day at school we cross paths.  Did I run to her with excitement to tell her about my dream… Ummm no! I wasn’t even sure how to bring it up.  I was hesitant, and kind of was like, “God, are you kidding me? I don’t know her like that.” I was kind of like a little kid shaking my head, internally of course, “I’m not doing this.” But boom, there we were just the two of us in the teacher’s lounge, “No, you didn’t.” So I approached her, and said what a normal person would say: “Don’t think I’m crazy or anything but I had this dream that you should get back to painting.” She was in shock because she had been really thinking about it and to have it spoken out loud to her from me, a co-worker, that’s it… well, it spoke volumes.  I like it when I have dreams like that… but yeah that wasn’t the dream last night.

I’ll admit I didn’t do my nightly prayers because I was binge-watching this series on my phone… So yeah, I get it…bring on the weird dream! So, my old house, an old childhood home where my fears were amplified in every area of my life.  That phase in my life when my self-esteem was hit hard, my true self hidden from the world.  God does speak in dreams, but the enemy also speaks in dreams.  The enemy uses your sacred time with God to counteract HIS every move but creating scenarios that are far from the truth to cause you to lose faith in HIS promises.  The same promises he has shown in your dreams… but like I said after learning this through sermons, conversations, bible study, I have learned to rise above the nonsense.  It will happen repeatedly, the enemy uses the same tactics, thinking they can still work even as you get spiritually stronger each day.  In the childhood home last night, it was dark and this strong wind went through, a scary thunderous wind, it was scary, and in the dream, I screamed out JESUS, no sound but I woke up saying HIS name.  Thanking Him, praising, and asking for his protection.  Oh, before that wind, I saw my “pseudo grandmother” who was so mean to me and pushed me aside, and she was coming down this cluttered, dirt staircase.  It was all so… NOT TRUE!  It was far from reality.  I could see right through it. The enemy didn’t want me to get up, and do what I was called to do. Just lay in the bed, look at IG for hours, and stay put.  The enemy didn’t want me to fight back. To get up! Get up and keep at it!

After I woke up saying  Jesus and praying out loud,  I laid there.  Meditated for a bit and fell asleep.  My dreams were much better, beautiful even.  His promises were shown to me once again, which in turn pushed me to GET UP!


Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power.  Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes.

Ephesians 6:10-11 NIV


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